An angry design post
Ex-xxx-clusive by the former Admin N, and the new ‘N’:
Disclaimer: no animals or self-proclaimed designers were harmed during the making of this post. However, if the design patterns in this country don’t change, I will hunt you down and I will kill each and every one of you.
Yes, this is an angry post.
I feel like our design schools are failing us, or maybe there’s a epidemic in this country that is hitting every “self-taught” Photoshop geek who wanted to be a designer but daddy wouldn’t let him (probably because daddy knew his kid sucks). But the point is, our city is being invaded by species who think they can design, they charge less and they are more desperate for work, so they don’t say no. Meanwhile, there’s a whole community of good designers out there who can barely make ends meet because they know a thing or two, and they have principles.
Fact is I can’t change that; I won’t even attempt to do so.
Before I start bashing the poster movement in this country, I have to admit there are a few people, or places, who are trying and we do appreciate it.
Which leads me to my first point: Memes were funny once, a long time ago, like when they first came out, like before the Lebanese people milked the hell out of them. But then you check facebook and BAM! A meme poster, a meme poster SO BAD that makes you want to gut your eye sockets with a fork. THE HORROR! Tsk tsk tsk and I had expected better from you. Yes, you know who you are. I’m talking to you, event host with usually awesome posters. (Yukunkun, so stop guessing.)
Now everyone repeat after me: I WILL NOT USE MEMES IN MY POSTERS.
(And don’t get me started about that hideous layout.)
Just remember, every time you include memes in your poster, grumpy cat will have multiple seizures and get paralyzed for 24h. haram!
Second point, if you’re doing a poster about a certain era, a certain theme, or a certain subject that has specific characteristics, you freaking research them! Google is magical, and it’s free, learn to use it for the love of god (or yoda). I understand you have a liking for a certain style, a certain movement or a certain Photoshop effect (pukes-a-bit), but please spare our intellectual knowledge and get inspired by what you are designing for, not what you like (or simply know what to do). If you are, for example, doing a poster about 80’s night, and you get inspired from the art nouveau movement and apply its characteristics onto that poster, I will hunt you down, and may the universe be witness, I will hunt you down and will lock you in a room and make you listen to nails screeching on boards all day!
Third, it has become apparent to me that the people doing posters for those glittery parties are glitterophobic themselves. I mean, why else would they undermine the whole glitter loving community by making such hideous posters for them. Or is this some kind of corporate agenda testing people’s response to such things. I mean I’m trying to make sense out of things, give them a little credit even though they completely disregard our own.
Everyone, repeat after me:
I SHALL NOT USE DAFONT-ish TYPEFACES
(If I don’t know what a proper typeface is and how to kern it)
I SHALL NOT BOMBARD THE POSTER WITH…
You know what, no, I don’t even know why I bother, this is a hopeless case. I guess I’ll have to just learn how to deal with it in the hopes that it won’t make me anorexic or worst, BULIMIC!
And please do not let me start talking about those facebook posts with pretty pictures and Paolo Coelho-ish quotes (barf!)
In the end my dear readers, all I have to say is, if you think you’re a good designer, please think again! Ask around; take feedback on your posters or anything you design. Who knows, maybe you’ll discover that you have wasted half your life in this stupid field where as you could’ve been fulfilling your true destiny of becoming a door-to-door encyclopedia salesperson. It’s never too late!